Wayne’s World


On Wednesday, Congress held hearings on gun control in front of the Senate Judiciary Committee. This is the first debate of many to be held after President Obama recently proposed enacting sweeping gun control reforms as part of his second term presidency.

The November election not only kept Obama in office, but his sweep of almost all demographics outside the White male, gave him unprecedented capitol to put forth progressive changes in gun control legislation. The demise (slow but sure) of the Tea Party, and the shift of the GOP to a more center right party will undoubtedly help to push through much if not all of the proposed changes. At least that is my hope.

Story continues below.

Wayne LaPierre
Wayne LaPierre

But one of the people brought to testify on Capitol Hill this week is my favorite new Mr. Crazy Pants, Wayne LaPierre, President of the National Rifle Association. A man who truly believes that this country’s survival rests with arming every single citizen with, at the very least, a pretty little hand gun. Or a manly Bushmiller, if you have the upper arm strength. Personally, I am spending my days in the gym working on that area just in case the revolution Mr. LaPierre predicts actually happens.

Story continues below.

Now, Mr. LaPierre, Wayne, would have you think he’s as tough as nails! So tough you thought he was made out of the same material as the assault weapons he loves so dearly. But according to Dana Milbank, of the Washington Post, Mr. LaPierre is so terrified of reporters, or just the general public, he actually travels with body guards.

“When he and his colleagues stepped off the elevator in the Dirksen Senate Office Building on Wednesday morning and found TV cameras waiting in the hallway, LaPierre’s bodyguards swung into action. One of them, in blatant violation of congressional rules, bumped and body-checked journalists out of the way so they couldn’t film LaPierre or question him as he walked.”

Richard Mourdock
Richard Mourdock

So this smug coward walks into the Capitol with armed bodyguards in clear violations of Congressional rules. He must truly think the NRA owns the building. And with all the politicians that are indebted, literally, to the NRA, who could blame him? I went to the NRA Political Victory Fund website to see what it could tell me about the politicians they endorse and to view the grading system the NRA uses to bully candidates to vote the NRA way. I found the pages closed to anyone not a member. I then looked at their news link and the last article was, hold on to your guns, Richard Mourdock’s Significant Win in the Indiana U.S. Senate Primary Election. Remember Mourdock and his sensitive feelings about rape? “I think that even when life begins in that horrible situation of rape, that it is something that God intended to happen.” Fantastic endorsement NRA!

After the Newtown slaughter, Wayne announced the NRA came up with a brilliant solution to gun violence in schools. Let’s hire men (of course in Wayne’s World, they are all men) arm them and have them roam the halls “protecting” the school from God knows who. These armed thugs, like the ones protecting Wayne, are a perfect example of the kind of person he wants patrolling your schools. Armed, muscled, arrogant and in charge. According to the National Center for Education Statistics, there were 98,817 public schools during the 2009-2010 school year. I shudder to think exactly who Mr. LaPierre expects to fill these positions in so many schools. I also did not hear his plan to pay for these armed “guards.”

Story continues below.

Of course Mr. LaPierre has problems with any kind of gun control. His stance seems to be that the public should have unfettered access to any kind of gun, rifle, AK-47, any assault weapon they want. He also sees no problem with ammunition clips that can tear a child apart in a matter of seconds. Exactly like those used to murder 20 children in an elementary school. His argument is that the 2nd Amendment says we can arm ourselves, period. Well, following that argument, why not arm ourselves with actual military grade weaponry, such as surface to air missiles, or any of the fabulous items listed on this website. I’m thinking about buying the Armored CarMy new car! which, according to the website: “remains a viable part of the modern fighting force, utilized to scout, engage, support or protect as required.” I’ll park it outside my apartment building and use it on the next car with a broken alarm! BAM!!!!! Problem solved.

In Wayne’s world, nothing should be off limits. You want a tank? Scream 2nd Amendment! How about a Howizter? HowitzerGreat for those Fourth of July displays of patriotism. 2nd Amendment! Wayne, where does it stop? At what point do we have enough fire power to make you feel safe? Or is that the point? Wayne does not want us to ever feel safe because then his Board Members won’t make any money. Many of the NRA Board Members are owners of Firearm companies including this patriot: Ronnie G. Barrett, Founder of Barrett Firearms Manufacturing which makes and sells ammo that can penetrate armor. You know, for that robber wearing a bullet proof vest as robbers have been known to do.

This list is a who’s who of White rage and paranoia including that has-been 70’s rocker Ted Nugent. Why he has not followed up on his promise to be in jail or dead if Obama was re-elected is beyond me. Come on Ted, show me you aren’t a liar!

Story continues below.

Wayne has been working overtime to line up men and women to describe how scary and violent our world is. For these hearings, the NRA trotted out Gayle Trotter, a woman who believes that there is a rapist and murderer banging on the front door of every single woman and single mother in this country. She believes that the only way for single gals in the Big City to sleep is to have a loaded gun (a pink Hello Kitty one of course) gununder my pillow ready to take the bad guy down! I do confess, that the only thing under my pillow is my asthma inhaler, but I could use it to help the intruder breathe easier after he assaults me. “An assault weapon in the hands of a young woman defending her babies in her home becomes a defense weapon,” said Trotter, a mother of six. “And the peace of mind she has … knowing she has a scary-looking gun gives her more courage when she’s fighting hardened violent criminals.” Where exactly does Ms. Trotter live, in Syria?

Story continues below.

Gayle, I live in New York City, alone, in an area not known for their sidewalk cafes and bistros. And for the 8 years in my neighborhood I have NEVER, not once, felt the need to have a gun to defend myself from these violent criminals you seem to think linger on every corner. I have NEVER been mugged, assaulted, harassed or felt threatened in any way. Now I can’t speak for the suburb I imagine you live in, but maybe suburbs are more attractive to the hordes of violent criminals hell bent on assaulting single women and moms.

But back to Wayne and his belief that background checks are not only unnecessary, but a waste of time and money. During the hearings, Wayne stated, When it comes to background checks, let’s be honest — background checks will never be universal because criminals will never submit to them.” LaPierre later got into an argument over the issue with Sen. Dick Durbin, D-Ill., after LaPierre argued that more background checks would merely subject “law-abiding people” to more taxes and fees and hassle without going after “bad guys.”

“Mr. LaPierre that’s the point,” Durbin said. “The criminals won’t get to purchase the guns because there’ll be a background check. We’ll stop them from the original purchase — you missed that point completely. I think it’s basic.”

So the answer is to simply do nothing? No closing the gun show loop holes which Wayne and the NRA seemed to agree with several years ago? Simply enforce existing laws? Status Quo is good enough for the NRA.

Gabby Giffords and Mark Kelly
Gabby Giffords and husband Mark Kelly

At last, we heard from an actual victim of gun violence, Rep. Gabby Giffords. Rep. Giffords used her newly found voice to urge Congress to work with the administration to enact gun control laws that will make it more difficult to obtain the kind of weaponry favored by those intent on carnage. “Violence is a big problem. Too many children are dying,”

Her husband then spoke about how a “matrix” of failures contributes to the country’s gun violence problem, including mental illness and poverty, but also gun laws. He said the complexity is “not an excuse for inaction.” Kelly said weapons designed to inflict maximum damage have turned corners of America “into places of carnage and gross human loss.”

Story continues below.

What made this testimony so real, was the fact that during his testimony, Mr. Kelly broke the news of yet another shooting, this time in Phoenix, Ariz., in which three people were shot and two more were injured.

Hey, Wayne, maybe we need to start arming office complexes, movie theaters, college campuses, post offices, maybe even churches? Here is a list of the names of those killed since Newtown, it’s incomplete as it is constantly and sadly being updated. To help you determine where your “well regulated NRA militia” needs to be sent, here is a list of locations of the deadliest shootings in US history.