Entertation Index, March 14-25: Hey, I Can See Julianne Moore From My House!

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Twice monthly, the CFR publishes a condensed, best-of-the-best version of The Brown Tweed Society‘s acclaimed Entertation Index.

It compiles the best dish, gossip and celebrity news filtered via Brown Tweed’s unique sensibility.

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And so…

The Entertation Index, March 14-25:

Brown, Chris — After becoming upset at questions about ex-girlfriend Rihanna on popular morning show Good Morning America, singer Chris Brown reportedly trashed a dressing room by throwing a chair into a window and destroying it. Good Morning America hasn’t seen this much on-set destruction since a 2008 “Getting Into Bikini-Body Shape for Summer” segment turned nasty.

Link: Chris Brown Flips Out, Smashes Window After GMA (Us Magazine)

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DaredevilTwilight: Eclipse director David Slade has been tapped to helm a reboot of the Daredevil superhero franchise for 20th Century Fox Pictures, resetting the button on the original Ben Affleck version of 2003 and successfully proving once again that in Hollywood today, you don’t even have to try to do anything right the first time.

Link: David Slade Will Direct a Daredevil Reboot for Fox (CinemaBlend)

Douglas, Diandra — Michael Douglas’s ex-wife admits trying to squeeze more money out of him because Bernie Madoff screwed her out of a lot of the $45 million she won from Douglas in their 2000 divorce. So, to rephrase, someone took money given to her by someone else, so she went after someone for more money that wasn’t hers instead of, say, trying to make her own money. Stay classy, Diandra!

Link: Diandra Goes for More (NY Post)

Duran, Duran — As part of a promotLional concert series for American Express called “Unstaged,” art film director David Lynch will be pairing with ’80s new-wave Brit-rockers Duran Duran for a live, webcasted performance merging the sensibilities of the two. It should be a perfect marriage: after all, why Duran Duran thinks they can make a comeback is easily just as confusing as Mulholland Drive.

Link: David Lynch Tells Movieline What to Expect from his Duran Duran Concert Collaboration (Movieline)

HGTV — Anthony Sayers, HGTV Canada’s co-host of a homeflipping program called The Unsellables, has been called onto the carpet under very serious allegations of criminal harassment over work done at the home of a Toronto woman. The woman alleges that Sayers repeatedly called her at all hours of the night, leaving threats that he would not leave her alone until she seriously began to consider replacing her standard Xeriscape-style backyard with a Mediterranean-style terraced garden.

Link: HGTV Host Faces Criminal Harassment Charges (Toronto Star)

Gaga, Lady — The flamboyant songstress followed up a recent concert in Louisville, Kentucky, by dropping by a local drag bar and putting on a surprise performance for the patrons. As far as Lady Gaga numbers go for that evening, hers was fourth best.

Link: Lady Gaga Thrills Fans at Louisville Drag Club (Starpulse)

Lohan, Lindsay — After Lohan admitted to her probation officer that she drank kombucha tea, which has about .5% alcohol (also called “water” by Lohan), the L.A. County Probation department is strongly pushing for her to be jailed. Another reason: Chained Heat II.

Link: Lohan In Trouble Again? (TMZ)

Lowe, Rob — The Wayne’s World actor will reportedly not replace Charlie Sheen on Two and a Half Men. The show’s creator felt Lowe simply didn’t have that magical mix of world-beating narcissism and drug-induced batshit-craziness.

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Link: Lowe Not Bailing (Hollywood Reporter)

Lynch, David — See: Duran, Duran

McGowan, Rose — The Planet Terror actress has been granted a restraining order against Louis S. Santo III, who has threatened her and repeatedly tried to contact her. One would think Santo would know better than to screw with a woman who once had a machine gun with a grenade launcher for a leg.

Link: McGowan Wins Restraining Order (Huffington Post)

Palin, Sarah — Julianne Moore will portray the ex-governor of Alaska in HBO film Game Change, about the 2008 presidential election. Palin isn’t terribly pleased, saying, “I’ll just grit my teeth and bear whatever comes what may with that movie,” which is code for “I’ll get pissed about a film that will probably make me look terrible, but realize I can’t do a goddamned thing about it.”

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Link: We Want Moore-Palin (Hollywood Gossip)

Pie, AmericanUniversal announced yesterday that it has plans to reunite the entire cast of 1999‚Ä≤s massively successful comedy hit American Pie for a fourth movie — and has already garnered signatures on the dotted-line by Pie stars Jason Biggs, Seann William Scott and Eugene Levy, with negotiations with the rest of the cast in the works. So if you wondered how long it would take to blow through American Pie kind of money, the answer is, officially, 12 years.

Link: Jason Biggs, Seann William Scott, Eugene Levy Reunite for New American Pie (The Wrap)

Sculpture, Mayan — Mexico’s National Institute of Anthropology and History has discovered the pre-Columbian stone sculpture of a Mayan warrior, which sold for more than $4 million at a Paris art auction earlier this week, is a fake — and was actually made recently and designed to have an “ancient appearance.” Experts said that the first tip-off that the piece was a fraud was that the Mayan warriors of 750 A.D. were not actually semi-trucks which turned into robots.

Link: Mayan Relic Sold for $4 Million is a Fake? (Reuters)

Superman — It’s being directed by Zack Snyder and produced by Chris Nolan, but you are forgiven for questioning casting Kevin Costner as Clark Kent’s dad. Just look at it this way: everything about the movie could suck eggs and it still wouldn’t be the worst Superman reboot of the last five years.

Link: Costner in Superman (Deadline)

Swift, Taylor — The country-pop darling has joined the cast of a 3D animated version of Dr. Seuss classic The Lorax. As you may recall, The Lorax is about a pixie-ish young blonde who uses up all the fame in the world, leaving none for anyone else.

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Link: Taylor’s Movie Gig (EW)

Timberbiel, Justica — The super-sexy Hollywood pairing of Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel has ended mutually and amicably, says People. Apparently, the two “realized they wanted different things in life.” Those “things” are rumored to be hotter significant others, which will be physically impossible for both of them.

Link: JT, JB Split (People)

Wood, Evan RachelThe Wrestler star, currently appearing with Kate Winslet in HBO’s period drama Mildred Pierce, tells TMZ that for to keep things thoroughly 1930s-authentic for a full-frontal nude scene, she wore a hairpiece designed to depict her pubic hair. HBO saved money, though: it was Paul Giamatti’s wig from HBO’s 2008 miniseries John Adams.

Link: Evan Rachel Wood in Mildred Pierce — The Merkin Tale (TMZ)

Read the full Entertation Index only at The Brown Tweed Society, where you’ll find thoughtful pop culture news, trends and commentary. Follow TBTS on Twitter @browntweed.

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